The Addict’s habit is but an exaggerated version of all habits, which cling to outworn realities rather than allowing new life to flow in. The root causes of addiction are hotly debated, but one aspect of the syndrome is that it brings pleasure to people who cannot find any other way.

Alice Miler observes “People who as children successfully repressed their intense feelings often try to regain, at least for a short time, their lost intensity of experience with the help of drugs and alcohol”.

Many people have anaesthetized a huge portion of their feeling self. For to show strong emotions is rarely considered an acceptable form of behaviour in our society today, While paramount importance is placed on self-control. As a result many of us panic at the first sign of emotion starting to well up. Replacing the denial of emotion imposed upon us in childhood, we now exert enormous pressure to deny ourselves. Addiction “solves” this problem by permitting pleasure while at the same time insuring that the pleasure is furtive and guilt ridden.

From the moment the heroin addict first injected heroin into him self, long lost pleasure flooded him. His addiction is essentially no different of that of the cautious alcoholic who sneaks a shot of whiskey before brushing his teeth in the morning. Both are hooked on the alluring combination of enjoyment and guilt. The essence of any compulsive behaviour is the helpless repletion which pleasure alone would not be strong enough to incite. Alcoholics and heroin addicts, food bingers, and compulsive thieves all return again and again to the very behaviour that they would judge shameful in another person. At the heart of addiction lies a deep nostalgia for pleasure that echoes a legitimate need. Despite what our conditioning might tell us, to seek pleasure is not bad. The spur of desire drives everyone’s life. But hardly anyone can enjoy deep satisfaction untainted by feelings of guilt, selfishness, or augur premonition that this is to good to last.

The addict is caught in a circular trap of his own devising; he cannot get enough pleasure to finally abolish his guilt. He cannot suffer enough guilt to keep him from the next fix. Rather, the two impulses circle each other in an endless dance. What we have here is another example of the mistaken intellect. The Circular Trap depends upon the addict’s beliefs that his divided awareness cannot heal its self.

From the book "Unconditional Life"
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